03 May 2007

MOTORMOUTH III

'THE LOOK....'


“What you are about to read are not-affiliated to any car dealers and its industries ~ the writer interests ranging from sneakers to watches, collectors’ toys to DJs, classic cars to the fuel-smells from their carburetors.The writer speaks only for his bitter self”


You said I am JUDGEMENTAL? You said I only look at the good stuffs and ignore the bad ones?

You too, my friend, you too…


Let me put it this way for you,

A Babe, with a face like Angelina Jolie, A front-end like Pamela Anderson, A waist as small as a honey bee’s and a back-end like the rear of a Porsche nine-eleven… and We also have another ‘babe’ who looks like Captain Jack Sparrow, A front-end like Cameron Diaz, A waist like a Diesel-Drum and a back-end looks like a Perodua Kenari.

Both with a signage on their neck saying;
“ Please call me for a Good
Time ~ Dial 1-800-Goodtime”

You tell me which one you will call?
You have to be very
honest…WHICH ONE that makes you pick up that $1000 mobile phone of yours immediately?

You see? You got my drift?


Well, to relate all these to automotives…

What catches your eyes the very first second you saw ‘it’?
The ‘shape’ of it!!……… It all
boils down to the shape of ‘it’.
You may say… NO! I always must know what’s under the hood when I buy a vehicle no matter what!
BullShit!!

Will you buy an Evo-devo or Scooby-dooby or whatever you called them if they look like a Bullock-cart?

You saw a new vehicle on the road, you like the lines, the curves and the shape of it. Probably you’ll put on a mental note that you are going to buy it. A bigger and powerful ‘heart’ under the hood will definitely be a bonus. But hey, since you like it so much… you also probably don’t mind if a motorcycle 2-stroke engine powers it. And a no down-payment and super-low monthly installment will make your day too!!!

And with such a deal of no-down and low monthly installment, you won’t mind to ride in a vehicle that looks like a baboon’s arse too, right?

Just take a look ~



Or a dragonfly? (Big head-small arse)




Or maybe a Hearse?




So damn ugly!!!... They are just so-Damn-VERY ugly!!
How can ‘the look’ of the new vehicle nowadays can be transform into such an awkward shape? Why?
What kind of ‘statement’ the manufacturers and designers are trying to make?

The drivers will look ‘better’ if they are driving an ugly car?

I believed if these new vehicles now don’t look like a-pain-in the-arse, they will definitely look more like a ‘chick’ cars rather than a real ride. You agree?
If not, which of these new vehicles on Brune
i road are targeted for the real-man? … You tell me.

Real cars should have a better proportion from the front end and the rear end, designed and built with soul, with passion.
Not the mass-produced
‘slurppy-curvy-front-longer-than-arse’ or ‘arse-longer-than-front’ look.

Ok, probably the Chrysler 300c looks like a real machine. Big engine, Big space, Huge front grille, Wide, Long and of course… with a very Gangster-Mafia look.



And don’t even mentioned the beetle with it’s proportion, please.
I can live with the old Classic 1968 spilt-windows VW beetle.

But a man driving the new ‘sissy’ beetle?

I rather cycle my BMX

HEH !





2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm with ya there mate. Soooooo many SISSY cars at the momn but nothing tough, rugged and macho, i.e., REAL. Should've given a mention to the GEEK cars - you know those ones driven by ah beng and ah lian wearing glasses and white collar shirt (Goldlion brand). GEEK cars are such usually anythig that look like & have hape of Toyota Corolla - yucks. No soul. Think hey fuck real boring too. Only one position their whole life. Cool man - now when are you actually gonna feature a REAL vehicle?

retroman said...

Yea... The vehicle now are just so 'sissy'. hang on with me, gonna feature "REAL" rides soooon....